News You Can Use Late in the Day

1. Damien Cox suggest players like Scott Niedermayer and Ty Conklin should appear on the balloting for the Hart Trophy. I think he has spent too much time in Toronto. The only trophies these guys should get are Best Mid-Season Un-retirement and Best Option Available in Pittsburgh (Which Isn't Saying Much) awards.
2. Danielle Goyette has retired from hockey at the age of 41.
3. Willie O'Ree recalls his NHL debut.
4. Bob McKenzie reports that Marian Hossa will test the UFA waters this year, and expects to be traded.
5. Martine Gaillard (Meow) says that the one good thing about the implosion of the Leafs is that players and management are giving candid interviews.
6. News and Notes from the CHL.
7. The USHL has posted their draft lists for 1992's and 1993's. They have also entered into a sponsorship agreement with JLG Architects.
8. The NHL Hot or Not list from John Kreiser.
9. Inside College Hockey gives us their Hobey Baker tracker. Is it me or does the kid from St. Cloud look like a guy from ABBA?
10. Al Strachan offers advice to Leafs management.
11. Fox Sports profiles the top snubs for the NHL All-Star Game.
12. Jeff Marek with an interesting take on the price of young defensemen.
13. Bobby Orr has been selected to the World Sports Hall of Fame.
14. David Staples examines the "older" free-agent signees from last summer and how they are progressing.
15. Allan Muir of SI answers questions in his weekly mailbag.
16. The Stars have recalled BJ Crombeen and the Canucks have recalled Mason Raymond.
17. Interesting story on Dennis Polonich and his year of pro hockey in Europe.
18. The NHL and the IIHF are meeting in New York to discuss transfer agreements, though Russia is still not expected to sign the agreement. In Soviet Russia, agreement signs you.
19. A Q and A with Gerald Coleman and Trevor Daley.
20. Ryan Dixon details the miracle that was Sergei Samsonov's 3-point game and uses his gleaming wit to tell us NHL'ers should wear masks. If you are over 18 and still wearing a mask in the NHL, you should relinquish your nuts and start watching Sex in the City.
21. Another humourous entry by Jamie McLennan in his blog on playing hockey in Japan.
22. The Hockey News tells us about 10 players they had never heard of before. Thats some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.
23. Ending the worst kept secret since Brad dumped Jen, the Leafs have received permission to talk to Cliff Fletcher.
24. The Score highlights the young players making an impact in the game today. In mentioning Oilers rearguard Ladislav Smid, we can only assume that the Score is a sucker for guys who are consistently -3.
25. To cap off an especially boring news day, a look at the ECAC.

The Score Gives Steve Ludzik a Mulligan

Last night I posted a video clip showing The Score analyst Steve Ludzik's satisfactory commentary on the Maple Leafs' awful defense.

Clearly, broadcasting like this is not suitable to re-air on a quality network like The Score, and they forced Ludzik to take a mulligan. The clip I posted last night was aired Tuesday night, the following clip is the retake that was aired Wednesday afternoon. It features a few differences, Ludzik uses the same phrases, but does not have the same enthusiasm. Also, the studio gave him some nifty glasses to wear. The Score feels that viewers will like a more sophisticated looking analyst.

"Are You Shitting Me Wozniewski!?!?"

Here is The Score analyst Steve Ludzik attempting to break down the Maple Leafs' poor defensive play. He drops the "S Bomb" uttering the phrase "are you shitting me Wozniewski!" and then quickly tries to cover it up by saying kidding. When the camera goes to him in the studio he really has no idea what he is even saying and just begins laughing. The Score has always been known for their top quality analysts.

Cold Hard Rants

NB: This rant applies to all sports, not just hockey.

Every now and then there is an event of such epic proportions that words can not do it justice. The shock is significant, leaving you feeling shaky, irritable, and uncertain about what to do next. Unfortunately, I had one of these experiences this past week. In the course of my usual travails around the digital universe, I had the great misfortune to land on a sports highlight show. Now normally, this is not an issue that causes me such anxiety, but in this specific instance the aforementioned highlight show was showing, complete with in-depth analysis, I repeat in-depth analysis, clips from an exhibition hockey game.

Here’s one of my rules in life and I encourage all television producers or aspiring television producers to adopt it as well. Under no circumstances should exhibition ANYTHING take precedence in a highlight package over a sporting event that actually counts in the standings. Period. While I would readily apply this rule to any sport, the incident that has most recently left me scarred was an exhibition game involving the Toronto Maple Leafs. I do not know who they were playing against. I do not care who they were playing against. All I know is that I had the great misfortune of having John Liu or some other “informative” TSN personality breathlessly analyzing the Leafs game as if their defeat of the North Carolina State Ice Hockey team (or some similar team) is some barometer of success during the regular season. Newsflash to the leafs fans actually putting some stock in these games; get a life.

In sports, despite all the clichés and assorted other crap we were inundated with as youths, the only thing that matters is who wins. That’s why the only categories listed in the sports pages are wins, losses, and the occasional tie. There isn’t a column for giving 110 percent, or trying your hardest, or games you should have won but didn’t. That’s why exhibition games do not matter and as such should not be reported on with the detail shown by TSN, SPORTSNET, and The Score. At the end of the exhibition season, do you get any reward over the team that finished dead last? Of course not. Exhibition games are bastardizations of sport and should be treated as such by the respective media.

So, I say to you Steve Kouleas of The Score, stop screaming at me about the great play of random Ottawa Senator defenseman who will be returned to his OHL team before the NHL season begins, because I do not care. And listen up Hockeycentral panel on Sportsnet, I really do not need your breaking news that the Los Angeles Kings have placed Dan Cloutier on waivers—if he was any good, he would not be on waivers in the first place. And last but not least, listen real good TSN SportsCentre producer, under no circumstances should Toronto Maple Leafs exhibition highlights, with or without post game analysis, be shown on my screen before I am fully updated on the pennant races in Major League Baseball, any occurrences in the NFL, and for that matter any professional sports league that is in the process of playing a game that actually counts. Even Nascar. And I hate Nascar.

For Illegal Curve, I am Andrew M.

About the writer: Formerly a speech writer for a Canadian Federal Politician, Andrew will be bringing his unique take on the hockey world to the illegal curve blog once a week, or more often if the rage needs to be released in a manner other than clobbering a referee over the head with a whiskey bottle. Mainly because he doesn’t have enough empty whiskey bottles at his disposal.